So lately I’ve been shopping for body parts. Not in a Silence of the Lambs sort of way silly. Ewwwww! In a properly display my knitwear kind of way. So today, Sugarbee and I headed down to a discount fixture store in what can only be described as an um, interesting area of town. I must say, though, I had high hopes and I was not disappointed. Meet Olga!
She is one of their more zaftig models with a nice 39″-40″ inch bust or so. Thank goodness (and Sugarbee) for tape measures. Interestingly enough, for a long time lately I have severely underestimated the size of my bust. (Stop laughing!) Anyhow, I have a number of sweaters that will fit Olga beautifully. Like Tithe (that’s a Ravelry link there – get yourself an account!). Someday soon, maybe they will fit me as well. Although I might have to drop all of my friends. I eat most of my bad food when I’m with them.
Olga is beautiful, but she’s a bit short. So after we had bought and paid for our purchases, a nice man asked if we had looked upstairs. Upstairs? How did we miss the entire upstairs? So up the stairs we went. With all the discarded display racks and mannequin parts, it was really a mighty fine set for a horror movie. And don’t even ask about the anatomically correct male mannequins. Ewwwwww! But then I found just what Olga needed. A stand! So now she can wear longer sweaters as well.
But wait! Olga is not what I was really looking for there. I was looking for limbs, appendages if you will. Hands and feet to be exact. And maybe a larger head. Well there were no good hands or heads to be found, but I did get a leg.
Quite lovely, eh? This is Tootsie. Get it? Tootsie the Footsie? Ok, maybe not. But it amused me. She needs cleaned up a bit, but this was a discount place. And compared to the prices I’ve been looking at, I got the deal of the century! (Plus shipping body parts ain’t cheap!) And just look at how well she models my socks! Perfect I tell you!
I’m a little bit worried about how excited I am about these body parts. As was the salesman I think. But hey, at least I wasn’t shopping for skin. Go ahead and say it. Ewwwwww!