Inspired by Waltz In Exile I thought I would share a typical morning around here. What? If you can’t think of your own blog fodder, steal someone else’s. Right? Our evenings are not nearly as hectic as our mornings though, so here’s a typical school morning for you.
6:00 AM – My alarm clock buzzes. Smack it. Hard. Sleep for 9 more minutes.
6:09 AM – Repeat above.
6:18 AM – Repeat above.
6:27 AM – Holy hashbrowns! Drag my arse out of bed and stumble to the bathroom. Do a quick e-mail check and open the door to the boys’ room. Threaten to turn on the light.
6:33 AM – After 6 minutes of “get out of beds” complete with cheesy song* to try to ensure good moods of said boys, turn on the light. Cover ears to block out the sound of screaming. “The light! It burns!” You would think they were vampires.
6:40 AM – Lay out breakfast and start packing lunch. Try to convince boy #2 that cold chicken orzo casserole will not be a tasty lunch, but figure it’s not worth it and give up. Ask boy #1 seventeen times what sort of sandwich he wants. Man is out of bed, so start making man’s breakfast.
6:53 AM – Holler at boys who have done nothing buy lie on the couch and curse the light. Try to get some form of food in them before they are off to face the day.
7:00 AM – Steer boys towards clothing. That they did not lie out the night before. Again. Now they wear uniforms, so it shouldn’t be that danged hard, but it takes them 20 minutes to find a shirt and pants, and we don’t have 20 minutes to spare.
7:05 AM – Finish packing man’s lunch. Leave lunchbag open because man will repack said lunch, rearrange it, add or take away ice packs, and generally try to control said lunch in some fashion.
7:07 AM – “Leaving in 13 minutes!” Call out the to-do list to boys who are now mostly dressed. “Teeth & pits! Teeth & pits! No one wants to be around a boy with BO and bad breath!”
7:08 AM – Watch man take everything out of his lunch box, grab a different lunch box, and completely re-pack it. Did not yell at man or mock him because he put the other lunchbox away.
7:17 AM – Have finally dressed myself and now go to stinky boys to make sure they actually did their teeth and pits. Take pathetic dog outside. Pathetic dog refuses to go on the grass because there is dew. Pathetic dog is crated until after boy drop off so pathetic dog does not pee on carpet.
7:27 AM – Leave house 7 minutes late. Referee the shotgun wars that ensue the moment we step out of the house. I swear to all that is Holy I’m gonna either write up a shotgun calendar or call no shotgun for the rest of eternity.
7:35 AM – Arrive at school, drop off boys, and bemoan the fact that there is no time for a nap today. Wondering if you can actually get caffeine poisoning.
The good news of the morning is that after I dropped off the boys, I took the pins out of this and got a nice full length shot of it. Once I do the beauty shots and the final pattern edit, it will be up for sale!
*Cheesy song – “Get up you sleepy head. Haul your hiney out of bed. Motivate your motor head, and haul your hiney out of bed.”